Sam, you know I wish you no ill will, especially in this holiday season, but with two weeks left, I sure hope you go 3-13 twice.

Otherwise I don’t think I can catch you. Actually, I don’t think I can catch you if you go 3-13 twice the way I’m picking them now. I had a 5-8-3 Week 15, and Sam could have put me completely away. But he was 6-7-3. So the lead is six games, with (after last night’s Colts win) 31 to play. That’s pretty safe territory … unless you’re the Mets.

As for Gang Cannibus, I don’t see another miracle fumble returned for a touchdown, and therefore I see a disaster in the Pacific Northwest. And then Chad Pennington comes home next week and finishes off the whole ridiculously over-optimistic Brett Favre experiment. Well, at least the Jets sold a lot of merchandise and PSLs.

I think the Giants bounce back big-time in the cold of night in the swamp, and claim the No. 1 seed in the NFC and the bye that Brandon Jacobs, Justin Tuck, Kareem McKenzie and Co. need. Plus it gives the guys an off week to visit the Latin Quarter—not that a game week has ever stopped them before. Somebody needs to tell Antonio Pierce, though, that the last two weeks weren’t bye weeks.

Speaking of Byes, we can say goodbye to that gosh-awful stadium with the hole in the roof after tomorrow. What a dump.

Here we go:
Standings
Sam 113-103-6 —
Carp 107-109-6 6GB

WEEK 16
w-Colts (-6 1/2) over JAGS
COWBOYS (-4) over Ravens
SEAHAWKS (+4 1/2) over Jets
GIANTS (-3) over Panthers
TITANS (+2) over Steelers
Dolphins (-4) over CHIEFS
PATRIOTS (-7 1/2) over Cardinals
BROWNS (-2 1/2) over Bengals
49ers (-5 1/2) over RAMS
Saints (-7) over LIONS
BUCS (-3 1/2) over Chargers
RAIDERS (+7) over Texans
Bills (+6 1/2) over BRONCOS
VIKINGS (-3 1/2) over Falcons
Eagles (-5) over REDSKINS
BEARS (-4) over Packers

4:45 p.m., Friday, Sam says:

Well, the weather outside is definitely frightful and I’m hoping that my last two weeks of regular season picks are not nearly so ugly. I like to think I’m better than the Mets when it comes to holding on to a lead,
but the truth is that I could easily see myself coughing it up. The picks game is a tough one. There’s no guarantees.

(In case you can’t tell, I subscribe to the ‘don’t ever do anything that might jinx yourself’ theory. Thus, I’m going to downplay my chances now that we’re in crunch time instead of continuing to talk about how terrible Carp is at these picks – and boy, is he terrible. Not that I’m focusing on that.)

Anyway, on to the picks!
L-JAGS (+6 1/2) over Colts
COWBOYS (-4) over Ravens
Jets (-4 1/2) over SEAHAWKS
GIANTS (-3) over Panthers
Steelers (-2) over TITANS
Dolphins (-4) over CHIEFS
PATRIOTS (-7 1/2) over Cardinals
BROWNS (-2 1/2) over Bengals
RAMS (+5 1/2) over 49ers
LIONS (+7) over Saints
BUCS (-3 1/2) over Chargers
Texans (-7) over RAIDERS
BRONCOS (-6 1/2) over Bills
VIKINGS (-3 1/2) over Falcons
Eagles (-5) over REDSKINS
BEARS (-4) over Packers

CARP SAYS:

Sam, even a wordsmith like you doesn’t have the word to describe how terrible I’ve been lately. I’m picking almost as poorly as Antonio Pierce has been playing. Almost. But I can still scare the scrooge out of you with a good week this week, so I can’t be all that bad.